So What R U Going to Do About IT?

I was fairly whiney last post.  Don't I know it?!  Can't say it's out of my system....but that I doesn't mean I'm not also looking for solutions OTHER THAN RETAIL THERAPY.

I can't do anything about the kids' schedules.  What kind of mom would I be if I didn't let them play sports, etc and made sure they got there?  I can't say that I'm going to get out of helping them with their homework either.

I can't make them any more accountable at home.  Believe me, I'VE TRIED.  I've tried cajoling them, YELLING, crying, BEGGING.  I've even stopped doing things.  NOTHING WORKS  If they want to live in a pig sty, I guess I'm going to just let them.

re:  Work

I've become a bit of a lazy butt, too trusting, and a baby.  When I started this job, it was too good--a little bit of bookkeeping, answering the phones, and paper shuffling.  My responsibilities have evolved tremendously and I'm not much happy about it.  Since quitting is not an option, I guess I'll have to make the best of it, including trying to make some changes that will help me be less stressed out.

Not Even Cool

C thinks she is SO cool....

Oh, to be a teenager again where life consists of boys, fashion, boys, friends, boys, school, boys!

I found this picture on the camera after hunting it down in C's room so I could take some pictures of my own.  I think this pic will probably show up on her FB page if it hasn't already.

I am beyond being cool.  Being cool, looking great, doing what I want to do aren't even in the realm of possibility for me anymore and IT SUCKS!

Now all I look forward to is having an uneventful morning-----NEVER HAPPENS-----a quiet day at work----NEVER HAPPENS-----a peaceful evening-----NEVER HAPPENS.

Yesterday morning it was A who decided he was too tired to go to school.  I had to drag him into the building and beg for help.  (This was the culmunation of a hectic morning that involved yelling--ME--and crying--THEM.)  I was a half hour late to work.  Work was AWFUL!  We ended our evening with more tears after learning that Z has two F's and a D--he's been in school since 8/16.

Today, I had a flat tire.  I picked up a screw at some point yesterday--maybe at one of the two soccer practices I had to be at in addition to getting C from volleyball.  Fortunately, M noticed it before he left for work and changed it for me after dropping Z off early for play practice (yes, we will be discussing activities if his grades don't improve).  He dropped the tire off to be told that it was ruined because of where the screw embedded itself.  Thank God for warranties!  The tire will be replaced with a small pro-rated fee to paid by us.  M was an hour late to work.

Yes, life is what you make of it.  I seem to be making a disaster pie out of mine.

Oh, yeah, that's right.  I'm supposed to be positive about things.  I'm supposed to be able to handle all this crap.  Prayer is not even helping me right now.  I tried drinking last week--one weak margarita and I was toasted and I woke up with a headache the next day.

UGH!

I'm just happy to have survived the day....

The T-Shirt Quilt (My Version of Bella's T-Shirt Quilt)

It's finished!  Instead of starting something new after getting my quilting life back together, I decided to finish the T-shirt quilt.  Read all about it at The Twilight Quilters Coven.  Thank you to everyone that was so supportive and especially Elizabeth that donated the In and Out shirt.

Quilting at Midnight

maybe that's when I'll have to do it?

Quilting: Be All That You Can Be!

I've done more thinking about quilting than the actually doing of it in the past month.  I put myself in a situation getting the T-shirt quilted so I could finish it, but I've let it sit for a couple of weeks because I'm not ready to be daring yet and try that new caterpillar binding.  I'm pretty aggravated with myself.  I've cleaned up my supplies and I feel better for it but even that process has gotten me to reflect on purchases, projects, and who I am as a quilter and my future.

As is my modus operandi, I work myself up into a tizzy and then sit back and take stock of things.

I've done a lot of blog hopping recently and I've seen some amazing work out there and it's made me ask myself,  "Am I the quilter I want to be and COULD be?"

How anyone else chooses to quilt is their business!  I just know that I'm not who I want to be as a quilter.  I want to take better care.  I want to try new techniques.  I want to finish more things--but, I'm not putting myself in a race.

Quilting will never be more than a hobby for me.  I don't have the stamina, patience, or training to have it be more than that.  But, even as a hobby quilter, I know I could be so much more.  It's like when I was talking about the quilting thing.  It's that I don't spend enough time on my projects.  I'm usually in a rush to finish something.

Even though I'm not in a race, I feel like I've been jogging in place for a long time as far as the type of projects I work on.

Compromise

I don't like the concept of compromise too much .  I'm usually the one that gives up the most for one reason or another.  When I do compromise, I'm rarely happy about it....and it always shows....eventually.  I like to get my way.  I like to win....at all costs.  It's the truth of the matter.  One more reason for me to be deemed a  bad person or unlikeable.  I'm like a 40-year old in a 2-year old's body!

We're not out of the woods yet as far as M's job is concerned.  It seems that his previous employer has taken great offense--to the point of wanting to take legal action--that he dare work for a new start-up company in the same industry in the same town.....with some of "their" clients going with.  He is strictly an employee of this new company, but his previous boss did leave and started the new company that he is working for as of tomorrow.  He was "terminated" early from his old company last Thursday after giving notice almost a month ago.  He and his boss received one of those scare the pants off of you letters full of legal mumbo jumbo on Friday.  He says he's not worried......

He bought his truck yesterday.  Used....a great steal of a deal he just couldn't pass up...  I guess I should be happy that he traded in the Beast (the Suburban) in the deal which I had asked about his intentions previously.  It's one of those situations where I knew he was going to do it.  It's his money.  I said my piece, but he was going to do what he wanted to do.  He wanted it and there was not talking him out of it with any of MY sense of reason.  I thought we should wait, but I knew that wasn't going to happen.

On a personal note, I'm trying to focus.  I feel like I'm a little manic right now.  My job is pretty crazy right now.  The kids are SO busy--C is doing school volleyball and Rec soccer; Z signed up for school cross country, the school play, and he's doing Rec soccer; S is doing Rec soccer and school choir; A is doing Rec soccer and Scouts--if the league can find a coach.  No one can do their homework on their own.  I'm struggling with dinner options every night--we had pizza last night and the kids ended up fighting over the Cinnastix.  (I screamed out that we're never ordering them again even if they're FREE...)  I'm once again asking how people MOMS do it?!

I compromised as far as the quilting books is concerned.  I've decided I can leave one tote of books upstairs.  I rescued a couple of totes that weren't suitable to store fabric because they weren't able to be sealed properly since the lids no longer fit well or the tote itself was compromised.  I've still got to go through the ripped up magazines and get them back together--separating all the Twilight stuff out.  I'm so far behind as far as that project is concerned.  I'm trying to feel the love again.  Z really has been on me to finish it, even talking about it last night.  Ho hum....  I got the rest of S's strips ironed and cut so she can continue with her project.  She wanted to sew last night, but I was too wiped out.

I desperately need a ME day where it's just me.  I'd go to the movies and/or lunch.  Shopping.  I don't know!  Something....

Quilting is About Solutions

I'm stumped.

I'm finishing up my cleaning, reorganization, or whatever you want to call it.  Almost everything has found its place again.  I gave away a tiny bit of fabric and some of my books to Goodwill.  I washed fabric that had escaped from totes because I didn't want to put it into a new tote dusty or infested with who knows what....  I went through UFOs and projects I had set aside to refamiliarize myself with them all.

Quilting has always been partly about solutions for me.  I feel like I'm problem solving at many points when I'm doing it.

My books are a problem.  I want them out, but I can't.  I don't have anywhere to put them.  I sew in the living room.  I've taken as much as I can back downstairs only leaving three totes of Twilight stuff upstairs because that is the project I'm working on right now.  I guess I'm going to have to store them again in totes downstairs.  I wish I could have them upstairs on a bookshelf or something.  I hate it when the living room becomes cluttered with totes.

I wanted to finish everything up and I'm very close.  I've got books and ripped up magazine pages all over the living room right now.  I finished the rest of the fabric this morning.  I'm at the point where I'm shuffling stuff around.  I can't buy anything else until Tuesday.

I sewed with S today.  I brought up the spare sewing machine and we got it going.  She needs a guide to line up her seam and this sewing machine isn't as forgiving as mine.  We used a straw on mine the last time, but we used an acrylic ruler on this one.  I'll have to think about it some more to see if I can come up with something better.  The needle on this machine doesn't move which is a problem.  She's made 20 blocks so far.  I had her separate the remaining fabrics into sets for the Rail Fence blocks so I can cut them into the strips and get them ready for her.

I'm eager to get back to sewing myself.  I take advantage of football Sundays to sew without guilt.  I did practice free motion some more on Sarah's machine.  I think I like it better than mine.  I've found the most amazing free motion quilting site and it's been so helpful.  I already had the Magic Slider and so I knew how helpful it could be.  I'm eager to get a quilt done so I can practice some more on something real.

If truth be known, there is a lot of reasons why I don't quilt my own quilts.  I've talked about it.  Perfectionism.  Lack of Confidence.  Not having the right tools.  Laziness!!!!!  How can I spend so much time on making a quilt and not quilt it to the best of my ability?  I can say that I've not ever taken the TIME to quilt something because at this point I just want to get it done.....  This has been a big mistake. 

I've really taken in ALL the tips, tools, and methods at this site.  For the first time, things are making sense.  I am realizing that I will have to take the time to properly prepare my machine and the quilt for quilting.  My success depends on it.

Check it out!  365 Days of Free Motion Quilting Filler Designs