It Gets Better

Yesterday I wrote about the soccer tournament that my girls are participating in this weekend, specifically that S's coach insisted that the team participate and then told us this week that he wasn't going to be able to coach because he was going out of town.

Let me tell you where I sit before I stand:  nothing less than a death in the family would be a good enough excuse for him to not coach this tournament.  I don't particularly care for the coach's personality, but S doesn't seem to mind.  I feel like he coaches with only his daughter's interests in mind.  I also don't like the guy he brought in as assistant coach this year.  (More than one parent had suggested that he needed help and that they would be willing to help coach, but he rebuffed them all.  This new guy is goofy and immature.  Most of the girls do not like him!)

He insisted that the girls participate because even though they would probably get killed by all the competitive teams, it would be good experience for them.  He didn't come out and say these other things, but this is the impression I got.  1) He really wanted to do a tournament and we should reward him for coaching by doing the tournament.  2) It would be a good opportunity for his daughter, the soccer goddess, to play.  3) He wanted to extend the soccer season as long as he could.

We felt guilted into the tournament.  I was less than thrilled about it being on the holiday weekend.  I gave in because S wanted to play with her team--INCLUDING her coach.

When I found out on Monday night by EMAIL that he wasn't going to coach, I had a fit.  I did wonder if I was the only one, but then I talked to some of the other parents and they were as upset as I was.  A group of us talked about it more yesterday at practice.  Everyone was pissed....  We all were in agreement that we wouldn't pull the girls because it wouldn't be fair to the team or the other teams in the tournament.  The coach knew we were talking and came over and confronted us.

What a dickhead!!!!

He didn't understand what our problem was with him not coaching.  He refused to acknowledge a reason why anyone would be annoyed or disappointed in him for him not coaching.  He suggested we were being selfish.  It made no difference if he coached or not.  He went on and on.  ....He said he didn't care if the girls played.

My point is that he shouldn't have insisted we do this tournament if he wasn't going to coach it.  Team is Team, including the coach.  If there was any chance he wasn't going to be there, barring emergency, he should have at least let us know.  He was very cavalier about the whole thing, refused to apologize, and refused to understand why we had issues.

As it turns out, one of the other moms not involved in this discussion and not understanding why we chose to have the discussion with Scott then, told us she's known for over two weeks that he wasn't going to coach.  She was surprised to learn many of us didn't know until this week.  He knew from the very beginning that he wasn't going to coach. 
I don't want S to play on this team anymore if he's going to coach!